Love Makes Sense: The Four Loves by CS Lewis

 

On Friday, I hope to join the monthly discussion of the New York CS Lewis Society.  The topic is The Four Loves.  I love this book and am hoping to participate, but even retirees have schedule conflicts and I will be on the way to Minneapolis to see two of my six kids.  

I have read and re-read this book since the mid-1980s.  From then to now, the four loves are and have been the frame through which I see relationships, my own and those around me.  To begin where Lewis did, there are four words for love in Greek. Most languages have just one. In French and Hebrew and many other languages, like and love are the same word.  In popular usage, like and love are hard to tell apart in English.  

In Greek: 

Storge στοργη, means affection, the love in families.

Philia φιλια, is friendship, not just acquaintance.

Eros εροϲ is romantic love.

Agape aγαπη is charity.

I used the grid (above) in a talk I gave in a Russian literature class about how the characters in a novel related to each other--both good and bad. 

From my first reading of The Four Loves, I was interested in the relationship of the loves to each other. If you look across the grid, the top row are the "natural" loves, those shared with animals. The bottom row are "spiritual" loves, shared with spirits (for those who believe in a spiritual world) and people who are spiritual.  

The natural loves are always best when embodied.  We can maintain a family relationship at a distance, but a happy family wants to be together.  There are too many jokes for me to repeat about the difference between romance in person and on line.  

In the columns, the loves are merited, and unmerited.  Storge and Agape are alike in that they do not (or should not) depend on how good or bad the loved person is.  Parents love children whether they are beautiful, or not.  When Mother Teresa went to Calcutta, she helped those considered the worst: those of the lowest caste with leprosy.  

But we choose our friends and lovers based on merit.  The lover is dazzled by the beloved. The friend finds another who shares the same deep interest and says, "What! You too?" Romance and friendship can continue through hardship and grief, but they begin with merit. 

Friendship and romance, while similar in being based on merit, have opposite expression because one is spiritual and the other natural.  The posture of friendship is side by side sharing an activity or idea.  Lovers are face to face. They want each other. English idiom says this best.  If two friends become lovers, we say the friendship "turned into" love. 

The book is full of example, detail and clear explanation of the best and the worst of each kind of love.  I could (and have) recommend this book to anyone except a cave dwelling hermit--and maybe seeing what she is missing this book would lure her out of the cave.  

In a world so suffused with hate and manipulation it can be difficult to believe love is at the center of life, the universe and everything.  But reading this book, seeing how love is part of everything that is good in our lives, The Four Loves might be the most hopeful book I ever read.  

By the way, a decade ago, I wrote about a fellow soldier choosing between Eros and Philia.

First Book of 2022: Unflattening by Nick Sousanis

My first book of 2022 was in the category graphic novel. But the book in question is not a novel. It is a philosophy book that is written with words and drawings.  

But graphic novel is the category according to Wikipedia, so I will go with it:

A graphic novel is a book made up of comics content. Although the word "novel" normally refers to long fictional works, the term "graphic novel" is applied broadly and includes fiction, non-fiction, and anthologized work. It is, at least in the United States, typically distinct from the term "comic book", which is generally used for comics periodicals and trade paperbacks.

Before I read Unflattening, I heard Nick Sousanis talk about how his book came to be and what he was trying to do with his use of graphics.  I loved hearing him talk about how our eyes follow images and graphical cues and how he used that knowledge to create the book.

I liked this review by comicsgrid.com

Over eight chapters, Unflattening follows an anonymous, sleepwalking figure as they step out of a regimented life and take flight to explore new worlds. Sousanis draws the imagery of these worlds from TV, movies, the classical canon of art, and scientific diagrams. Unflattening embraces visual references from Paleolithic cave prints to James Bond films, and verbal ones from Bruno Latour to Wallace Stevens. The protagonist bears at one time Hermes’ sandals and at others wings of its own; it is incarnated as a Pinocchio-like puppet confounded by a centipede’s existential challenge, ‘Who are you?’, before finally being reborn as a child reminiscent of Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968). The comic’s final image is of that newborn’s eye opening to see the world as if for the first time.

In the course of this journey, Sousanis dethrones the primacy of the word in a kind of Copernican revolution. He argues that image is not mere illustration, subordinate to words, but an equal partner and component in thinking. He explores stereoscopic vision and the principles of astronomical observation as metaphors in order to define ‘unflattening’ as ‘a simultaneous engagement of multiple vantage points from which to engender new ways of seeing.’ (Sousanis 2015: 32).

An extended sequence takes us through the world of Edwin Abbott’s Flatland, in which two-dimensional ‘A. Square’ encounters a three-dimensional sphere who exposes him to previously unimagined perspectives. We need each other’s points of view, Sousanis tells us, to avoid become constrained in set modes of thinking and blinkered perspectives, just as A. Square must be enlightened by his encounter with the sphere. Words and images together free us from the limitations presented by either the purely visual or purely verbal. 

And here are a few pages.  

I hesitated to read the book for a long time, but now I am reading two other graphic novels (both biographies of scientists).  Unflattening will take your mind places it has never been before.

Enjoy!

My books of 2021:

Fiction

Non fiction 

Favorite

Books of 2022

January 6, 2021, the End of Democracy in America

 

Trump horde ending democracy in America

From the beginning of my military service nearly 50 years ago, until the last my last day in the Army in May 2016, I attended dozens of change of command ceremonies. After the flag is passed the new and out-going commanders often make a speech.  Probably one in three of those speeches made a sincere nod to the American tradition of the peaceful transfer of power.  

For the mostly conservative officers taking or relinquishing authority, they linked themselves to a 200-plus year American tradition--a hallmark of American exceptionalism.  

But that ended one year ago today when the 45th President sent a mob to overturn the election he just lost.  The coup d'etat was mere minutes from success.  Hundreds of Trump supporters were screaming to kill Mike Pence.  If they had managed to stop the vote, the election could have been thrown into the House of Representatives. That is the last possible place in which a disputed election can be decided according to the Constitution.  

With one vote per state, Trump would have taken the election.  

All of my adult life I had an implicit belief in progress in America: more rights for more people.  The racist rednecks would recede, I believed.  

With Trump's nomination and election, my belief cracked.  After Charlottesville it was shattered. With January 6, it was gone. The end of democracy was only a matter of when.  

America no longer has a tradition of the peaceful transfer of power.  I voted for Joe Biden and hoped normal order could be restored in America.  One year later, the democratic party is fighting about infrastructure and social programs and has done nothing to fix the electoral count act or secure voting.  The Republicans are running MAGA candidates all over the country to get control of election counting.  How much does voting really matter if the Republicans are in charge of counting.  

In 2016, 63 million Americans voted for a failed casino owner who played a business man on a game show.  In 2020, 74 million Americans watched a lying buffoon for four years and said they would like four more.  The people who claim most publicly to be followers of Jesus (Love your neighbor; Love your enemies; turn the other cheek) worship Trump much more fervently than they follow anything Christ ever said or did. I have read and re-read the New Testament. Few people who have ever lived are less like Jesus than Donald Trump.

January 6, 2021, was a dress rehearsal.  The command performance is three years away. In 2025, there will be no need for a mob to attack.  The criminals will be in the building. They will use the power entrusted to them by the Constitution to end democracy. 

The Roman poet Horace fought to preserve the Republic during the Civil War after Julius Caesar took power and was murdered.  The Republicans lost. Horace was wounded and lost everything.  When he recovered, he knew the Republic was gone, so he made peace with his circumstances and became a poet, living the best life he could. 

I hope to be like Horace, to do my best to preserve the Republic, and when that fails, to protect my family and live as well as possible. 

Books of 2022: The Big Picture of What I Hope to Read in the Year Ahead

 

Here is a picture of 61 books I hope to read, have already started reading, or plan to re-read in the year ahead.  

Some are already in progress:

Game of Thrones Book 5.

Jon Meacham's biography of Thomas Jefferson.

Civilization by Niall Ferguson.

The Decameron.

And at least three books by Hannah Arendt.

Happy New Year!

Books of 2021: Fiction

In 2021 I read fourteen books under the vast category of fiction. The oldest of the books was written in the 14th Century.  The newest were published this year.  The authors as close as my own family and as far away as Russia. The setting of one novel is more than two thousand years ago, another is in the near future.  

In an earlier post I listed the non-fiction books I read in 2021.

In another post I said that my favorite book of 2021 was a work of fiction I did not finish: The Decameron by Giovanni Boccaccio. But having a favorite does not mean there were any books on the list I did not like. They are so different. But The Decameron was very much in my mind in our pandemic world.

Amelia's Journey to Find Family by Lauren Auster-Gussman.

My oldest daughter Lauren wrote this about a rescue dog she adopted and cared for in the last year of her life.  It's a lovely children's book both in the sense of a nice story and that her co-author made lovely illustrations for the story.

La Veritable Histoire de Trois Cochons by Erik Blegvad. I read children's books in French to practice that lovely language. This book is a traditional and gruesome retelling of the story fo the three pigs.

The Quick and the Dead and What Dark Days Seen by Alison Joseph. I met Alison Joseph in 2018 and read three of her mystery novels. She wrote a new one this year set in the pandemic reviving her Sister Agnes character. I read the new novel and the first Sister Agnes novel this year and plan to read more of Sister Agnes in 2022.

Klara and the Sun by Kazuo Ishiguro. I read and re-read everything Kazuo Ishiguro has written. The new novel is a chilling story of a future world in which Artificial Intelligence develops to the point that kids can have AFs, Artificial Friends. 

Untraceable by Sergei Lebedev. This very darkly funny novel imagines a Russia in which political dissidents would be poisoned by incompetent government secret agents. The attacks would be ordered by a former spy who became the President for Life of the Russian Federation and who wants the old Soviet Union back!  Crazy right?! 

Till We Have Faces Lewis by C.S. Lewis. I re-read this wonderful book for a discussion with the New York CS Lewis Society.  It is a re-telling of the Cupid and Psyche myth (which means it is also a retelling of Cinderella) from the perspective of the oldest stepsister.  The book is her complaint against the gods and her side of the story.  I read this book aloud to my daughters when they were in middle school as an example of a tough woman who becomes a great leader. The queen wears a mask her whole life as queen, so there's that connection to our world right now. The difference between appearance and reality is the best I have read in any novel.

The Mandrake by Niccolo Machiavelli. A very funny short play by a guy with a reputation for political advice. 

A Game of Thrones, A Feast for Crows, #4 and A Game of Thrones, A Storm of Swords, #3 by George R. R. Martin.  I watched the entire series on HBO. It was wonderful except for the ending.  The books are better.  I am currently reading book five and hoping the author lives to finish book 6!

The Tiger's Wife by Tea Obreht. An strange and mysterious story set vaguely in the former Yugoslavia.  A fascinating story.  

Selections from Canzonieri and Other Works by Francesco Petrarch. I started reading Petrarch to round out my reading of the Three Crowns of Florence:  Dante, Petrarch and Boccaccio.  The Decameron became my book of the year. Petrarch's sonnets led me to put more poetry in my reading, although this book is the only one I finished in 2021.

Arcadia by Tom Stoppard. I had never read Stoppard. This play is full of twists and fun and playful language and is a wonderful story.  I will read more or him in 2022. 

Laurus by Eugene Vodolazkin. I love this book.  I read it in 2016 and re-read it this year.  Set in the late 1,400s in Russia and across the world. 

Books of 2021: Non-Fiction

Non-fiction books of 2021

Just the list for now.  The highlighted links connect to my reviews of the book. 

My Favorite:

QED: The Strange Theory of Light and Matter by Richard Feynman.

My least favorite:

Hunting Magic Eels: Recovering Enchanted Faith in a Skeptical Age by Richard Beck

Biography, Memoir:

Lioness: Golda Meir and the Nation of Israel by Francine Klagsburn.

Elizabeth: The Struggle for the Throne by David Starkey.

Fun Home by Alison Bechdel.

Faith:

Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl.

Jesus and John Wayne: How White Evangelicals Corrupted a Faith and Fractured a Nation by Kristen Du Mez

Morality: Restoring the Common Good in Divided Times by Lord Rabbi Jonathan Sacks

The Neglected C.S. Lewis by Mark Neal and Jerry Root.

History:

Red Sea Spies: The True Story of the Mossad's Fake Holiday Resort by Raffi Berg

The Storm Before the Storm: The Beginning of the End of the Roman Republic by Mike Duncan

The Greek Way by Edith Hamilton

The Roman Way by by Edith Hamilton

A Higher Call: An incredible story of chivalry in the skies above war-torn Europe by Adam Makos.

Spearhead: An American Tank Gunner, His Enemy, and a Collision of Lives in World War II by Adam Makos.

The Machiavellians: Defenders of Freedom by James Burnham.

Philosophy:

Between Past and Future by Hannah Arendt.

The Human Condition by Hannah Arendt.

The Promise of Politics by Hannah Arendt.

Paradox by Margaret Cuonzo.

Socrates, Buddha, Confucius, Jesus by Karl Jaspers.

On Liberty by John Stuart Mill.

Open Society and Its Enemies by Karl Popper.

Technopoly by Neil Postman.

The Constitution of Knowledge: A Defense of Truth by Jonathan Rauch.

Being Wrong: Adventures in the Margin of Error by Kathryn Schulz

Social Science:

Mediocre by Ijeoma Oluo

Caste: The Origins of Our Discontent by Isabel Wilkerson

The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin

Science:

Sapiens by Yuval Noah Harari

Maphead by Ken Jennings

Some Assembly Required: Decoding Four Billion Years of Life, from Ancient Fossils to DNA by Neil Shubin

Books of 2021: First, My Favorite Book

 

The Decameron by Giovanni Boccaccio, 

translated by Wayne Rebhorn

In 2021, I read fifty books. But the first and best book of the year for me is the book I have not yet finished. It's a book I first read in 2015 and went back to last year: The Decameron by Giovanni Boccaccio. Also known as The Human Comedy in contrast to Dante Aligheri's Divine Comedy, The Decameron inspired Shakespeare's All's Well That Ends Well and Geoffrey Chaucer's Canterbury Tales among hundreds of other writers and their works over the past eight hundred yers.  

For me and many others, these tales written and published during the worst years of the Black Death in Florence have been a source of fun and inspiration during the current pandemic.  

I have loved the Divine Comedy for decades, but had not read Boccaccio nor Francesco Petrarch.  The lives of these three Florentines overlapped in the early thirteen hundreds.  Dante died in 1321 when Petrarch was 17 years old and Boccaccio was eight.  The two younger poets became friends after Boccaccio published The Decameron in 1352.  Together the three poets are known as The Three Crowns of Florence.  

After reading and re-reading Dante for 35 years, I read Boccaccio and Petrarch in 2015 in class on Medieval Italian Literature taught by Chelsea Pomponio at Franklin and Marshall College.  I was delighted by Boccaccio, less so by Petrarch. In 2020 as the pandemic sent the world into crisis, I went back to Boccaccio and to the sonnets of Petrarch.  Now I read both regularly, thinking about how they survived the terrible plague of their time and created stories and poems that inspired and delighted people ever since.  

My favorite book of 2021 is the book I have not yet finished: The Decameron.

In 2013, Joan Acocella reviewed the translation of The Decameron by Wayne A. Rebhorn in a long review in the New Yorker. It's a good review and gives a lot of background on the book. Here is the link.