Having six kids, three adopted and three the other way, is complicated. I began the journey of parenting confident that nature and nurture were about 50/50 influences in a child's life. Over the past 30 years, I came to believe children pop out about 90 percent who they are. Parents, siblings, environment and passing comets are the other 10 percent.
In a recent episode of her podcast "Honestly," soon-to-be-first-time-parent Bari Weiss assembled a panel of authors who recently published very different books on parenting. I did not agree with everything they said, but I did not disagree with everything they said--which is my default setting with modern parenting experts. Here is the panel:
I especially liked Doucleff and the whole idea of a village raising kids. It's a great discussion. Here's a link or you can subscribe to Honestly wherever you get podcasts.
Unlike many parents I know, I went into parenting knowing I would get a lot wrong. But the compensation for the over-confidence I started with has been how much the six kids who call me Dad have helped each other (and helped me) through difficult periods of life.
Okay. Maybe the nature/nurture split is 80/20.