Veteran of four wars, four enlistments, four branches: Air Force, Army, Army Reserve, Army National Guard. I am both an AF (Air Force) veteran and as Veteran AF (As Fuck)
Friday, October 11, 2013
Army Weak!
The Army will be getting a new fitness uniform soon to replace the current gray and black uniform that is Army ugly.
I saw the new uniform in the clothing sales store on Fort Meade. I noticed that "Army Strong" was written on the sleeve of the uniform.
I smiled.
When I came to Fort Meade and started Army PT at 4am, I scored a 297 on the PT test. Since then my fitness has declined. Before I came to Meade I was training for an Ironman triathlon, adding about a mile a month since swimming two miles in January. Now I am declining. I ran a marathon in March and have barely run 30 miles a month since I have been here. I ride everywhere on post but now my total miles have dropped from 800+ to less than 700 per month.
Am I whining?
Yes.
By being forced to do Army basic trainee PT five days a week, I do far less exercise than I would have on my own. And now it's starting to show.
This may be a good PT program for people who watch movies and play video games if they are not dragged out of bed in the morning, but it is a bad program for someone who actually trains.
One of my classmates runs two miles in 12 minutes and is training for a marathon next month. He does his long run on Wednesday night. At 5 am Wednesday morning we do hill sprints or sprint in a circle. At 5 pm, Ben runs 18, 20 or 22 miles.
Then he is up before dawn doing upper body exercises at 5am on Thursday.
Most units do not have returning sergeants who qualify for fitness awards do this kind of PT.
27 days to go.
Saturday, October 5, 2013
Another Reason the Air Force Laughs at us: Thursday Mentorship Training
Among the many ill-conceived programs we endure at school,
the Thursday mentorship program for Army soldiers is one of the dumbest.
Each Thursday at 4:30 p.m. we gather in a conference room of
the main school building and listen to a one-hour lecture about what our job
will be like out in the field. At least,
that is how the lecture is billed.
In reality, exactly one of the lectures had any real
connection to our immediate future in Army Public Affairs. But these lectures do have an effect on our
school experience.
They are one more ill-conceived and unnecessary
aggravation.
We get up at 4 a.m. each morning to do PT (Physical Training) and have eight hours of
classes each day finishing at 4 p.m.
Adding a lecture that will not be graded at the end of a 12-hour day
would be nasty if it were interesting.
But these lectures are farther off topic than cold-weather survival
training in Mogadishu, Somalia.
With one exception, these lectures are far above our pay
grade, and focused on active-duty Army.
The majority of the soldiers in these classes are enlisted and junior
NCOs in the National Guard and Reserve.
Four weeks ago, a Sergeant First Class talked to us for 73
minutes about the distribution of Public Affairs leadership slots in the active
Army. His focus was on officers and
senior NCOs. And he droned on 13 minutes
over his hour in front of people who had already spent a whole day in class.
Two weeks ago, a Master Sergeant spoke for his entire hour
about creating PowerPoint slides for command briefings. He is a perfect example of the kind of
speaker that drives speechwriters crazy:
he thinks he is funny, and he is not.
Worse still, he thinks he is funny when he is just being himself. He said toward the end of the hour, “I know
this stuff is dry, but at least I am entertaining right?”
He got a mildly affirmative answer, but what else could he
get. He has power over his audience and
was using it to make himself feel good.
To be fair, there was one useful mentoring hour. It lasted just 45 minutes. A Staff Sergeant who works on the Army’s
social media program talked to us about how the Army is currently using social
media and where the program is headed.
That talk was useful.
We got one ungraded day in our entire three-month school program about social media, and most
of us will return to units who have or need Facebook page administrators.
By the end of school we will have had 12 hours of mentorship, 12 hours mostly spent trying to stay awake listening to irrelevant information.
Army Strong!
Friday, October 4, 2013
We Won’t Be Heroes Forever
This is what a hero looks like.
I read a post on Facebook about a woman who lost her job
because she bitched about veterans getting discounts and being called
heroes. She had very little support, but
she had some.
The on-going government shut down, like the sequester, spreads pain
unevenly across America. Like any
Republican program, it will hurt the poor more than the rich, but any cut in
government programs will eventually cut veteran’s benefits. So the Republicans quickly moved to restore
benefits to veterans.
Sounds like something good.
It might be good in the short term, but government is a zero-sum
game. If you give money one place you
take it from another. So veterans get
benefits, but Headstart and school-lunch programs remain without money.
If the shutdown is a good idea, then veterans should be
screwed along with kids and cancer patients.
Because if we are not, eventually all those who care about kids and
cancer patients will remember that veterans got bennies when they did not.
I served when during Viet Nam when Rush Limbaugh, Bill
O’Reilly, Michael Savage, Dick Cheney and other draft dodgers were sneering at
veterans. And the public thought of us
as baby killers and college-student killers.
When we mobilized for Iraq, our commander said, “Envy
destroys community.” He was right. Now he is in the U.S. Congress and supporting
the shutdown. I hope he remembers his
own speech. The longer this shutdown
drags on, the more envy will eat at those who lost paychecks, lost research
grants, lost school-lunch programs, and lost clinical trials for their child
with cancer.
The public could hate us again. With reductions in force, we will soon be less
than one half of one percent of the population.
More people in America have PhD degrees that are currently serving in
the military.
Nobody likes people who cut in line.
Thursday, October 3, 2013
When We March Before Dawn
CS Lewis said one of the great pleasures in his life was
listening to male laughter. One morning
last week we were marching just past 5 a.m. and I suddenly remembered how much
I like the sound of men singing.
Our platoon sergeant has the kind of voice born to call
cadence, so the whole formation sounds best when he is marching us. Also, when we form up to march, the short
people move forward and the tall people go to the rear. This is standard practice in military
formations, but it has the side effect of making putting the women in the front
and the men in the back.
I am just about six feet tall. With 80 soldiers in four ranks, I am near the
back and surrounded by the men with the deepest voices. With the platoon sergeant’s voice ringing out
in the cold morning air, the formation echoed his calls loud and strong for the
half-mile march to the gymnasium.
The calls are all sterile now, none of the sexist bravado
and kill the enemy songs of my Viet-Nam-era basic training. Even when the swearing and bragging are
removed, 80 voices sounding off before dawn is an inspiring sound.
If you want to hear marching songs the way I heard them 40 years ago, watch the movie "Jarhead."
Wednesday, October 2, 2013
Fascinating Foodie--My First Feature at Army Journalism School
Today is the second day of the government shutdown. Among those on furlough is my primary writing instructor, Peter Robertson. My first feature was about him as a foodie. I hope you like the story. He is an interesting guy in many ways, long career as a Navy public affairs NCO, an avid comic book collector, and a stand-up comic among other things.
Now he is one of the hundreds of thousands of government employees deemed non-essential. I hope this ends soon. Our writing class wants him back!
------------------
Now he is one of the hundreds of thousands of government employees deemed non-essential. I hope this ends soon. Our writing class wants him back!
------------------
Peter
Robertson, a journalism instructor at the Defense Information School here, is
living proof that a “foodie” is made, not born.
As a child he wanted macaroni and cheese, hamburgers, and chicken
fingers. He and his younger brother protested
when their mom made falafel and other foods outside their narrow, mostly fried,
favorites.
Now
Robertson loves to cook and eat international cuisine. He sees food as a door to culture and a way
to preserve and share memories. Two
experiences turned him from narrow path of the typical American diet to making
the cooking and eating of a wide array of food a life-long adventure.
The
first big change happened when Robertson took a home economics class in the in
seventh grade. He took shop, art and
music classes that year, which he described as OK, but home economics “I kind
of enjoyed that,” he said.
“I
mastered the incredible, edible egg,” Robertson said. “I learned how to make pasta dishes,
lasagnas, from there I learned how to make stuffed shells,” he said. “By the time I left home to go to college I
felt I had cooking skills other people didn’t have.”
After
college, in the Navy, he continued to cook for himself and increase his skills.
On his first cruise in the Navy, Robertson had an experience that turned him
from competent cook into a foodie with a flair for international cuisine.
His
first deployment was a cruise of the Mediterranean Sea in 1997 with port calls
in Greece and Italy that began in Haifa, Israel. His shore visit should have been short but
extended to several days because of rough seas that kept ferry from taking him
back to the ship.
The
first place he ate was McDonalds which he said was a bad decision, though not
without culinary adventure. He had a
goose breast sandwich at the Israeli Golden Arches. “Every McDonalds caters to locals tastes,” he
said.
On the first or
second morning on shore he and some friends went to a hotel that had a giant
spread for breakfast, he said. On the
serving tables he saw, “Nothing that makes you think breakfast.”
“There was fish,
there was flatbread, there was olives, there were more olives, there were
tomatoes,” Robertson said. He started
eating, combing flavors. He was eating foods that were familiar, but in a
totally different way, he said. For the
rest of his stay he ate “mystery” meat from street
vendors and other foods he couldn’t identify—and he liked all of it.
As the cruise
continued Robertson ate local in Greece and Italy reveling in local cuisine
while most fellow sailors opted for American-style fast food and bars. Some sailors joined him when he wandered port
cities looking for good local food. His
friends then and now tend to be those who share his sense of adventure in
eating.
“If you are someone
who has an open mind about food, you probably have an open mind about life in
general,” he said. “And that’s the kind of person I like to surround myself
with.”
Among his recent
foodie friends is Erin Smith, also a journalism instructor at DINFOS. Smith and her husband go on couple dates to
restaurants in the Baltimore area with Robertson and his wife.
“He’s good
because he’s adventurous,” Smith said.
“I can’t think of a food and food group he doesn’t like and I’m the same
way. We can go out to kind of a funky,
hole-in-the-wall joint and find a good meal. He knows all the good places in
Baltimore.”
Robertson cooks
for family meals, for parties at his home, and sometimes brings his creations
to work. Smith remembers a tea-rubbed
smoked salmon he brought to DINFOS. “It was absolutely to die for,” she
said. “The tea and the smoke and
juiciness of the salmon we’re incredible, cooked to perfection, still a little
bit raw, a little rare.”
Robertson’s
favorite restaurant in Baltimore is Woodberry Kitchen, near Druid Park, north
of the city center. It serves local,
seasonal dishes, a cuisine Robertson dismissed earlier in his life in favor of
getting what he wanted wherever he was and at any time of the year. Now he sees local, seasonal food as the way
to get great flavor.
Though
Mediterranean cuisine is his first love, Robertson’s current passion is for
Korean food. “Korean food always amazes
me,” Robertson said. “Last weekend I had
Korean food at a place called the Honey Pig in suburban Baltimore—they have
this burner in the middle of the table, kind of like a wok, kind of like an
iron skillet.”
The food is
cooked at the table beginning with sprouts and adding “things I can’t
identify—sour and sweet—all the different kinds of meat, Korean barbecue spices,
pork bellies—more bacony than bacon—everything was delicious.”
For Robertson,
life in Baltimore combines a job he loves with a city of great restaurants, both
with local and international fare, access to a wide array of local ingredients
from the land and the sea, and good friends to share it all with. The little boy who wanted only chicken
fingers and burgers has grown into a man who both knows and cooks good food from
around the world, including some of recipes his mother made for her
not-so-adventurous sons more than 30 years ago.
Monday, September 30, 2013
Rough Two Weeks For My Entire Family: Life Happens Fast
On Wednesday, Sept. 18, we got news from Haiti that the adoption might finally be moving forward, and some other indications that Xavier's happy disposition is falling victim to his difficult circumstances and so much uncertainty about the adoption.
On the same day, Nigel skipped football practice because he was being teased and threatened by his teammates. Annalisa wrote to the vice principal, but the situation was not so good. And I was terribly sad. I think of middle school as the place where "The Lord of the Flies" is real. If I could spare my boys middle school, I would be so happy.
And then the news went from sad to bad.
The same the evening I got a text message from my oldest daughter that her dog, Watson, got hit by a car. Watson has bruised lungs, a broken leg, and possibly other internal injuries. Lauren loves her dog. I went to sleep that night feeling so sad for Lauren and Nigel and had a fleeting thought about what else could go wrong.
The next morning my step-daughter, Iolanthe, wrote to say her Dad, who has terminal cancer, would be going to hospice very soon. At this point, Watson was alive, but there were indications of internal bleeding and his bladder was swelling. The adoption agency said we needed to file some papers right away.
That night my daughter Lisa ate egg whites for dinner and spent the next two days with nasty food poisoning. She is 1000 miles away in Minnesota, so I could only pray and hope for the best.
Saturday morning, Iolanthe's Dad passed away. He had been in terrible pain so there was some relief along with the sadness.
Then we got some good news. Watson wagged his tail and seems to be good, but may have further internal injuries. The vice principal talked to Nigel and will help him with the team. The adoption agency said we can move forward with the paperwork and we have preliminary approval. Lisa was feeling better.
In the midst of all this was a low-level but aggravating problem with our other adopted son downloading images and games he should not be downloading.
Now the news keeps bouncing up and down. Nigel got to play in a game on Thursday, but then got taken off the team on Friday for missing practice.
Lisa is feeling better, Watson is getting better, and Iolanthe looked great at her Dad's memorial service.
Annalisa is holding up unbelievably well with many work pressures in addition to the family stuff.
If there was some way I could withdraw honorably from this school and go home, I would do it. Five weeks to go and I will be able to go home and help more with the all the kids.
I am hoping to take the boys to Lauren's house to see Watson, once Watson is feeling better. This coming weekend I plan to take them to Philadelphia on Saturday and give my wife a day off.
Two terrible weeks end tomorrow.
On the same day, Nigel skipped football practice because he was being teased and threatened by his teammates. Annalisa wrote to the vice principal, but the situation was not so good. And I was terribly sad. I think of middle school as the place where "The Lord of the Flies" is real. If I could spare my boys middle school, I would be so happy.
And then the news went from sad to bad.
The same the evening I got a text message from my oldest daughter that her dog, Watson, got hit by a car. Watson has bruised lungs, a broken leg, and possibly other internal injuries. Lauren loves her dog. I went to sleep that night feeling so sad for Lauren and Nigel and had a fleeting thought about what else could go wrong.
The next morning my step-daughter, Iolanthe, wrote to say her Dad, who has terminal cancer, would be going to hospice very soon. At this point, Watson was alive, but there were indications of internal bleeding and his bladder was swelling. The adoption agency said we needed to file some papers right away.
That night my daughter Lisa ate egg whites for dinner and spent the next two days with nasty food poisoning. She is 1000 miles away in Minnesota, so I could only pray and hope for the best.
Saturday morning, Iolanthe's Dad passed away. He had been in terrible pain so there was some relief along with the sadness.
Then we got some good news. Watson wagged his tail and seems to be good, but may have further internal injuries. The vice principal talked to Nigel and will help him with the team. The adoption agency said we can move forward with the paperwork and we have preliminary approval. Lisa was feeling better.
In the midst of all this was a low-level but aggravating problem with our other adopted son downloading images and games he should not be downloading.
Now the news keeps bouncing up and down. Nigel got to play in a game on Thursday, but then got taken off the team on Friday for missing practice.
Lisa is feeling better, Watson is getting better, and Iolanthe looked great at her Dad's memorial service.
Annalisa is holding up unbelievably well with many work pressures in addition to the family stuff.
If there was some way I could withdraw honorably from this school and go home, I would do it. Five weeks to go and I will be able to go home and help more with the all the kids.
I am hoping to take the boys to Lauren's house to see Watson, once Watson is feeling better. This coming weekend I plan to take them to Philadelphia on Saturday and give my wife a day off.
Two terrible weeks end tomorrow.
Friday, September 27, 2013
Missed the Toilet Bowl!!
In the military, soldiers, sailors, airmen and Marines hate few things more than mandatory fun: events that are supposed to be fun, but attendance is required, not requested.
I missed today's mandatory fun, an all-day sports event called The Toilet Bowl. Faculty from the Defense Information School play football against the instructors. The services also have games--Army and Air Force versus Navy and Marines. There is barbecue for lunch.
The event begins at 8 a.m. and ends at 3 p.m. For Army students, attendance is mandatory. Air Force students could attend, but if not, they had a long weekend.
Guess who was happier.
Two Army students were excused from the event (You could say flushed from the bowl!). I did not have to go because my step-daughter's father's memorial service is tomorrow. Another sergeant had a suicide in his home unit.
Everyone else went to the TB.
I asked one of my civilian instructors if he was going to the Bowl. He said he would, but he is also a Navy veteran and remember mandatory fun with no small amount of pain. He said, "I am a civilian. I can take leave."
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