Courage, Like All of Life, is Non-Linear

Sir Lewis Hamilton, 7-time Formula 1 World Champion

Courage, like so much of life, is non-linear.  Lewis Hamilton has won more races than any driver in the history of the Formula 1 World Championship. Several times in his 15-year career he has had crashes that shredded and splintered his 1100-pound arrow shaped car at speeds well above 100mph.  Most recently his title rival, Max Verstappen, caused a crash that end with with Verstappen's car on top of Hamilton's car. 

After every crash, Hamilton was back in the car the next week, racing at speeds over 200mph into corners with 5-g side loads. 

But Hamilton is very afraid of spiders.  Very afraid. 

In this month's cover story in Vanity Fair magazine about Hamilton, he tells the interviewer that during the race each year in Australia, he insists on a high floor in the hotel, to make extra sure no big Australian spiders are in his room.  Hamilton says he watched the movie Arachnophobia as a child and has been afraid of spiders ever since.  

All of us are complex accumulations of genetics, experience, motives and attitudes so there should be nothing surprising that a person who is very brave in one situation is afraid in another.  And yet, that ideal of the Medieval Knight says the brave person should be afraid of nothing. It lingers in our imaginations.

My Dad was a boxer. He wasn't afraid of facing another man and fighting with his fists. His last fight was in a warehouse with a 30-year-old truck driver who took a swing at him. Dad was 62 years old. He knocked the younger man out.  Yet Dad was afraid of doctors and hospitals.  I lost every fist fight I was in and love hosptials.

Recently, I was talking to a friend about his recent trip to several countries in Europe.  He had a seven-hour layover in Helsinki and decided to go and see the city.  

I could never do that. Ride the Alps and Pyrenees and hills in Israel above 50mph on descents--awesome.  Leave the airport and have to pass back through security and customs?  Not me. I would be worried the moment I left the security area. 

Riding across Paris in traffic is pure excitement. I don't imagine what could go wrong.  But dealing with bureaucracy, I can't easily imagine things going right. 

Is it years in the Army that makes me distrust bureaucracy? I don't know.  Nothing in my childhood could have done it.  Until I flew to Basic training at 18 years old, I had never been in an airplane.  Our family never traveled further from Boston that a couple of trips to Cleveland, Ohio. 

On the other hand, I have a fear of needles that is physical and deep. I don't look at needles when I get IVs and blood drawn. But that fear is straight out of childhood.  In the basement of our home was this horrible torture device.

Vintage Singer Sewing Machine and Terror Device

One day, I was alone in the basement and stepped on the treadle of this terrifying machine, got the wheel spinning fast then (I have no idea why) slid the first finger of my five-year-old right hand into the path of that needle.  I screamed. So when my guts tighten up for a routine blood draw, I know where it comes from.  

I walked to my most recent bone-repair surgery feeling really happy. I was going to see old friends who had treated me before.  And walked home just as happy.  But I did not look at the needles during my stay the hospital.

Life-Long Bike Obsession Began with a Trike Trip

"Suicide Cycling Around the World"

That's the title a former co-worker said I should use for a memoir.  Another friend was encouraging me to write about deploying to Iraq for a year, landing in country on my 56th birthday. 

But Daria was sure the better book would be about biking.

I love bikes of all kinds: bicycles, motorcycles, scooters, and the various three-wheeled varieties.  I love the sensation of speed, especially leaning into corners.

My first bike was a red tricycle.  I mostly rode it in the driveway and on the sidewalk on the fairly busy street we lived on I was four--when we moved to an even busier street in another part of Stoneham, Massachusetts.  

One afternoon, I was, according to a story my parents told for years after, riding in the driveway on a Saturday. I was three years old. Dad was at work. Mom went in the house with my then one-year-old sister.  While speeding up and down the driveway on Hancock Street, I decided I could ride to the bakery in Stoneham Square.  

They had jelly doughnuts!  

All of my life, I have been able to see a route in my head that I traveled only once or twice.  In this case, my mother had walked with me to the doughnut shop just a half mile away. Our house on Hancock Street was on the east side of Route 28. The doughnut shop was on the west side.

In the 1950s, Route 28 was the main road north from Boston to central New Hampshire including the state capital, Concord.  I had to ride four blocks to Route 28, cross the four-lane highway and ride past the library and up the hill past the fish store to the middle of Stoneham Square.  

Somehow I did it.

I got my doughnut.  The baker told the owner of the drugstore next door about the little boy on the tricycle. Al Pullo, the owner of the drugstore, called my mom. She came to get me and was not pleased about my trip.  

The next year we moved to Oak Street in Stoneham. At some point I got a Columbia 24-inch 2-wheel bicycle and was riding much further. At eight years old, I rode from Stoneham to Sullivan Square on Route 28 and took a subway to Boston and back. I hid the bike behind a dumpster and, surprisingly, it was there when I returned.

In the six decades since, I have ridden a bicycle in 41 countries and ridden roughly 200,000 miles. I did not ride bicycles between ages 13 and 36, but owned a dozen motorcycles.  

Daria was right. Now I have to actually write it.

The Last Interview and Other Conversations by Hannah Arendt: Book 26 of 2022

Hannah Arendt was very much a public intellectual. She was willing to speak and be interviewed on radio and TV and in public settings.  The interviews collected in this book are from the last decade of her life.  

The first interview occurred on October 28, 1964, with the German TV personality Gunter Gaus. World War II and the Holocaust ended with German Surrender just 19 years before the interview.  Twelve years before that, Hannah Arendt fled to France when persecution of Jews began with Hitler's rise to power.  

The interview covers Arendt's life in Germany, life as a refugee, and as an American scholar.  Arendt and Gaus also talk about the Eichmann trial and Arendt's very controversial reporting on the trial.  

On the rise of Hitler to power she said, 

People often think today that German Jews were shocked in 1933 because Hitler assumed power. As far as I and the people of my generation are concerned, I can say that is a curious misunderstanding. Naturally, Hitler's rise to power was very bad. But it was political. It wasn't personal. We didn't need Hitler's assumption of power to know the Nazis were our enemies! That had been completely evident for at least four years to anyone who wasn't feebleminded. We also knew a large number of the German people were behind them. That could not shock or surprise us in 1933.

Gaus then asks,  

You mean that the shock in 1933 came from the fact that events went from the generally political to the personal?

Arendt responds,

Not even that. Or that too. First of all, the generally political became a personal fate when one emigrated. Second...friends "coordinated" or got in line. The problem, the personal problem was not what our enemies did but what our friends did.

Arendt describes an "empty space" that formed around her and other Jews as "friends" followed the Nazi Party and abandoned her and other Jews. 

In an interview in October 1973, shortly before Arendt's death in 1975, she was interviewed by Roger Errera or ORTF TV, France.  In the interview, which covered many topics and was filmed over several sessions, Errera made a comment that Arendt answered and I could see why I was so taken with Arendt's thinking and felt compelled to read all of her major works.

Errera:  

Our century seems to me dominated by a mode of thinking based on historical determinism.

Arendt:  

We don't know the future, everybody acts into the future, and nobody knows what he is doing, because the future is being done. ... Action is a "we" not an I...Now this makes it look as though what actually happens is entirely contingent, and contingency is indeed one of the biggest factors in all of history. Nobody knows what is going to happen simply because so much depends upon an enormous amount of variables; in other words on simple hasard.  On the other hand, if you look back through history retrospectively, then you can--even though all this was contingent--you can tell the story makes sense. How is that possible? How is it possible in retrospect it always looks as though it couldn't have happened otherwise? All the variables have disappeared, and reality has such an overwhelming impact upon us that we cannot be bothered with what is actually an infinite variety of possibilities.

There is much more in these interviews.  If you have already read one or more of her books, these interviews will give you more perspective.   

I first read Hannah Arendt after I returned from deployment to Iraq in 2010. A new friend Sara Rouhi who was studying philosophy said, "You have to read Arendt." I did. Became obsessed and read all of her major works.  Sara was one of the people I was thinking about when I recommended making friends of all ages.

I wrote about her here.  

Books 8 and 20 in the list below are by Arendt. 

I brought up Arendt at a conference I attended in June on the subject of claiming territory in space.

Just before COVID, I went to my first conference at the Hannah Arendt Center at Bard College.

First 25 books of 2022:

Galapagos by Kurt Vonnegut

The Echo of Greece by Edith Hamilton

If This Isn't Nice, What Is? by Kurt Vonnegut

The War That Made the Roman Empire: Antony, Cleopatra, and Octavian at Actium by Barry S. Strauss. 

Civil Rights Baby by Nita Wiggins

Lecture's on Kant's Political Philosophy by Hannah Arendt

Le grec ancien facile par Marie-Dominique Poree

The Netanyahus by Joshua Cohen

Perelandra by C.S. Lewis

The Federalist Papers by Alexander Hamilton, James Madison and John Jay

First Principles by Thomas Ricks

Political Tribes by Amy Chua 

Book of Mercy by Leonard Cohen

A Brief History of Earth: Four Billion Years in Eight Chapters by Andrew Knoll

Prisoners of Geography by Tim Marshall

Understanding Beliefs by Nils Nilsson

1776 by David McCullough

The Life of the Mind by Hannah Arendt

Civilization: The West and the Rest by Niall Ferguson

How to Fight Anti-Semitism by Bari Weiss

Unflattening by Nick Sousanis

Marie Curie  by Agnieszka Biskup (en francais)

The Next Civil War by Stephen Marche

Fritz Haber, Volume 1 by David Vandermeulen

Galapagos by Kurt Vonnegut: Book 25 of 2022

In 1986, the human race was wiped out, except for a dozen people who escaped from Ecuador to the Galapagos island of Santa Rosalia.  From those dozen ill-matched survivors, after a million years, the human race was reborn as something close to fish.  

The end of the human race in 1986 was the direct result of our brains being too big.  Page after page throughout this very funny story, we learn that our oversized brains lie, are prone to self-deception, to self-regard and all sorts of self-destructive behaviors.  

The Virgil in this tour through the self-created Hell of modern life is a Vietnam War veteran who is the child of a terrible science fiction writer who has one fan in the entire world.  And that fan, a Swedish doctor in Thailand, treats the Vietnam War veteran for syphilis--and sends him to Sweden to be cured. He lives there until he is decapitated in a boatyard and becomes the ethereal guide of the book.

 To quote my last Vonnegut book, "If This Isn't Nice, What Is?"  

You could run out and buy or download the book.  

I got my copy of the book from a barista named Joe who works at The Coffee Bar in Avenel, NJ.  

Thanks Joe! It was as good as you said it was.    

First 24 books of 2022:

The Echo of Greece by Edith Hamilton

If This Isn't Nice, What Is? by Kurt Vonnegut

The War That Made the Roman Empire: Antony, Cleopatra, and Octavian at Actium by Barry S. Strauss. 

Civil Rights Baby by Nita Wiggins

Lecture's on Kant's Political Philosophy by Hannah Arendt

Le grec ancien facile par Marie-Dominique Poree

The Netanyahus by Joshua Cohen

Perelandra by C.S. Lewis

The Federalist Papers by Alexander Hamilton, James Madison and John Jay

First Principles by Thomas Ricks

Political Tribes by Amy Chua 

Book of Mercy by Leonard Cohen

A Brief History of Earth: Four Billion Years in Eight Chapters by Andrew Knoll

Prisoners of Geography by Tim Marshall

Understanding Beliefs by Nils Nilsson

1776 by David McCullough

The Life of the Mind by Hannah Arendt

Civilization: The West and the Rest by Niall Ferguson

How to Fight Anti-Semitism by Bari Weiss

Unflattening by Nick Sousanis

Marie Curie  by Agnieszka Biskup (en francais)

The Next Civil War by Stephen Marche

Fritz Haber, Volume 1 by David Vandermeulen

Marching Back to Health

Fifty years ago on February 1, I started Basic Training at Lackland Air Force Base in San Antonio. The skill I use the most from that eight weeks of learning to be part of a team is marching. In the past two decades I have been busted up pretty badly. 

In recovering from those injuries, I would square my shoulders, look straight ahead, take that 30-inch step and move out. After knee replacement surgery three years ago, my physical therapist was a young Marine. He taught me to walk again using cadence. 

In 2007 I smashed C7 and broke nine other bones in a bicycle race. For three months I wore a neck and chest brace. I walked at least three miles every day after I left the hospital. When I didn't feel motivated I would sing cadence in my head and walk very straight and tall. 

For an aging amateur athlete recovering from injuries and body repairs, marching the road to recovery has helped me recover more quickly.

The Echo of Greece by Edith Hamilton Book 24 of 2022

Edith Hamilton wrote a series of books on Greece and Rome.  This is the third I have read. The first two:  The Roman Way and The Greek Way are about the culture of these two empires at their height and their influence through the last two millennia.  

This book could a "WTF Happened?" to the the great culture of Greece. How did it fall so far so fast never to rise again?  The book answers the question by explaining 4th Century BC Greece in sharp contrast to the glories of the century before.  

The book begins by explaining the freedom that came into being in Athens in the 5th Century, something unique in the world up to that time.  Then she explains how Athens fell, the death of Socrates coming at about the same time as the defeat of Athens by Sparta.  

Then there is a chapter or part of a chapter on Isocrates, Plato, Aristotle, Alexander, Demosthenes, the stoics and finally Plutarch--a lovely homage to Plutarch's very famous Lives. 

Hamilton is witty, brilliant, and loves the ancient world. I recommend her books to anyone who cares about the culture of Greece and Rome. 

On freedom:  

Responsibility was the price every man must pay for freedom. It was to be had on no other terms.

Fundamental to everything the [ancient] Greeks achieved was their conviction that good for humanity was possible only if men were free, body, mind, and spirit, and if each man limited his own freedom. A good state or work of art or piece of thinking was possible only through the self-mastery of the free individual, self-government.

Freedom was born in Greece because there men limited their own freedom.... The limits to action established by law were a mere nothing compared to the limits established by a man's free choice. 

On God:

Through Plato, Aristotle came to believe in God; but Plato never attempted to prove His reality. Aristotle had to do so. Plato contemplated Him; Aristotle produced arguments to demonstrate Him. Plato never defined Him; but Aristotle thought God through logically, and concluded with entire satisfaction to himself that He was the Unmoved Mover.

First 23 books of 2022:

If This Isn't Nice, What Is? by Kurt Vonnegut

The War That Made the Roman Empire: Antony, Cleopatra, and Octavian at Actium by Barry S. Strauss. 

Civil Rights Baby by Nita Wiggins

Lecture's on Kant's Political Philosophy by Hannah Arendt

Le grec ancien facile par Marie-Dominique Poree

The Netanyahus by Joshua Cohen

Perelandra by C.S. Lewis

The Federalist Papers by Alexander Hamilton, James Madison and John Jay

First Principles by Thomas Ricks

Political Tribes by Amy Chua 

Book of Mercy by Leonard Cohen

A Brief History of Earth: Four Billion Years in Eight Chapters by Andrew Knoll

Prisoners of Geography by Tim Marshall

Understanding Beliefs by Nils Nilsson

1776 by David McCullough

The Life of the Mind by Hannah Arendt

Civilization: The West and the Rest by Niall Ferguson

How to Fight Anti-Semitism by Bari Weiss

Unflattening by Nick Sousanis

Marie Curie  by Agnieszka Biskup (en francais)

The Next Civil War by Stephen Marche

Fritz Haber, Volume 1 by David Vandermeulen

If This Isn't Nice, What Is? (Much) Expanded Second Edition: The Graduation Speeches and Other Words to Live By --Kurt Vonnegut Book 23 of 2022

 This short book is exactly what the subtitle promises in the inimitable style of Kurt Vonnegut.  The title quote is also the theme of the book:

“My Uncle Alex, who is up in Heaven now, one of the things he found objectionable about human beings was that they so rarely noticed it when times were sweet. We could be drinking lemonade in the shade of an apple tree in the summertime, and Uncle Alex would interrupt the conversation to say, "If this isn't nice, what is?

So I hope that you will do the same for the rest of your lives. When things are going sweetly and peacefully, please pause a moment, and then say out loud, "If this isn't nice, what is?”

Vonnegut puts being kind at the center of a good life: 

“There’s only one rule I know of—Goddam it, you’ve got to be kind.”

But he is quite aware that for most people, hate motivates:

“It is a tragedy, perhaps, that human beings can get so much energy and enthusiasm from hate. If you want to feel ten feet tall and as though you could run a hundred miles without stopping, hate beats pure cocaine any day. Hitler resurrected a beaten, bankrupt, half-starved nation with hatred and nothing more. Imagine that.”

Vonnegut loved growing up in Indiana, the schools he attended and the teachers he had:

“A show of hands, please: How many of you have had a teacher at any stage of your education, from the first grade until this day in May, who made you happier to be alive, prouder to be alive, than you had previously believed possible? Good! Now say the name of that teacher to someone sitting or standing near you. All done? Thank you, and drive home safely, and God bless you all.”

In his many books and articles he fulfilled what is my favorite quote from the book:

“The function of the artist is to make people like life better than before.”

For the rest of us, art is good for our souls:

“Practicing an art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow, for heaven’s sake. Sing in the shower. Dance to the radio. Tell stories.”

First 22 books of 2022:

The War That Made the Roman Empire: Antony, Cleopatra, and Octavian at Actium by Barry S. Strauss. 

Civil Rights Baby by Nita Wiggins

Lecture's on Kant's Political Philosophy by Hannah Arendt

Le grec ancien facile par Marie-Dominique Poree

The Netanyahus by Joshua Cohen

Perelandra by C.S. Lewis

The Federalist Papers by Alexander Hamilton, James Madison and John Jay

First Principles by Thomas Ricks

Political Tribes by Amy Chua 

Book of Mercy by Leonard Cohen

A Brief History of Earth: Four Billion Years in Eight Chapters by Andrew Knoll

Prisoners of Geography by Tim Marshall

Understanding Beliefs by Nils Nilsson

1776 by David McCullough

The Life of the Mind by Hannah Arendt

Civilization: The West and the Rest by Niall Ferguson

How to Fight Anti-Semitism by Bari Weiss

Unflattening by Nick Sousanis

Marie Curie  by Agnieszka Biskup (en francais)

The Next Civil War by Stephen Marche

Fritz Haber, Volume 1 by David Vandermeulen